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"Hey, New Port Richey​!​"

from Giants by Methodist Hospital

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lyrics

It’s been forever since “forever,” man
And I’m in no rush to go again
All my meals at the Pit Boss
All my nights on Main with friends

But it ain’t much to call a Main Street
Just Sims Park and some pool hall
The billiard felt all looks like tree moss,
So we don’t play that much at all

But none of my EMT pals ask anything of me
Just show up at Mitchell Field so we can play some rugby
This is the place I sat to scratch when my feet got itchy,
So every time I pray, I say, “Hey, New Port Richey…”

“Hey, New Port Richey!”

The Hooters here is on the waterfront,
So it’s more classy than the rest
We build mountains out of chicken bones
Got paper towels for all the mess

And I mistook her for a waitress,
Even though she was wearing jeans
Throwing her croutons to the catfish,
So she could keep her salad lean

As my speech got slurred, she purred. ‘Least that’s what I think.
Gotta stop thinking so zoological when I drink
Treat humans as humans, women as women. Are you with me?
‘Cause everybody hurts when you’re in New Port Richey

“That stings, New Port Richey!”

Guess I could always move to Hudson
(They’ve got cheaper oxycontin there)

You could say that she got sick,
Sick with responsibility
Left me with that thing we made
Rode a cigar to Ybor City

And I’m not saying that I blame her
‘Cause I never took her for a girl
Am I just some blood-and-bone container?
Another skull with surfer’s curls?

So now I’m thinking about my sins at the Elfers Bridge
Some nights, I catch myself straight-staring into the fridge
But no empty bottle of formula will ever convince me
That this son can’t have his fun in New Port Richey

“Fuck yeah, New Port Richey!”
“Fuck yeah, New Port Richey!”
“Fuck yeah, New Port Richey!”
“Fuck yeah, New Port Richey!”

Huh?

credits

from Giants, released October 20, 2017

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about

Methodist Hospital Chicago, Illinois

Dan Caffrey and Mae Shults are old friends from Chicago who have played music together in a variety of bands, including The Elizabeth Dane and a fight-themed cover band called The Lucky Shiners.

Dan lives in Brooklyn now, but they still make music together as Methodist Hospital. Whenever they play live (which has been only once), they're joined onstage by friends.
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