Driving home, we saw another movie
One being projected in the sky
The giant robots looked like holograms,
But we both knew they were real
Flashes of heat lightning with each punch
You asked if they could hurt us
And I said, “Nah, they’re too far away
And besides, one of them—the one who’s winning—he’s with the good guys”
Then you said something that sticks with me even today,
Mostly because you’re gone now, but…
Let’s face it, it was an advanced thing for a kid of your age to say:
“Once you get to be a certain size, it doesn’t matter if you’re good or bad
You’re so big, you cause destruction wherever you go,
Whether you want to or not
You can’t help it”
And that’s the part they never show in movies, I guess
The damage caused by all the heroes and the giants:
The rubble
The bodies
The blood
Then you said,
“If I ever make a Transformers movie, it’ll be like this, from our perspective
We’d just see them fighting
We wouldn’t know why
Because how could we?
How could we know who’s good or bad?
Or what they’re fighting for?
In my movie, you’re walking home from work
And you see a cloud of shattered brick
Then two of them burst out of it,
Just kicking the shit out of each other”
“Don’t swear,” I said
“Okay, kicking the crap out of each other
We would never find out the plot; just the outline of a plot
Us dead and them alive, still fighting,
Maybe on some other planet”
“Well, they’re still not anywhere near us,” I answered after a long silence
“They’re near Sunset Landing, way out on the water
Just watch the movie”
“You never want to talk about this”
“I don’t like talking”
“You never want to ask questions about it”
“I don’t like questions”
“It’s all we ever do
We just watch things without ever thinking about them”
Long pause
“Watch the movie”
We couldn’t hear their punches,
But at one point,
The hits did sync up with the rhythm of the windshield wipers
Did I mention it was raining?
Then, another being—something much bigger than either of the robots
Rose out of the water and fog
His skin was yellow-green, coated in boat oil
His beard was full of stars
And I thought he was going to gouge out the optics of the Decepticon leader,
Rip off his tricorn head and punt it out into the Gulf,
Where it would forever be a giant coral reef for clown fish and eels drawn to its electricity
But he didn’t
The Colossus paid the robots no mind
He just kept walking, back toward the valley I came from,
Boxing with himself,
Sending his fists through the stormclouds
He eventually squared off against a waterspout,
And when the funnel swept him away,
I knew our paths would cross again
Dan Caffrey and Mae Shults are old friends from Chicago who have played music together in a variety of bands, including The
Elizabeth Dane and a fight-themed cover band called The Lucky Shiners.
Dan lives in Brooklyn now, but they still make music together as Methodist Hospital. Whenever they play live (which has been only once), they're joined onstage by friends....more
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